There is a rumor that runs amok stating that we as humans complicate life. We abuse the simple joys and twist and deform them until they no longer hold any semblance of happiness for us and bring us nothing but torture.

It is said if we miss someone we should just call them. If we are angry we should forgive. If we are sad we should just get happy.

Basically, if it's complicated-simplifying would fix it.

Ahhh, but we are not one-dimensional soulless freaks.

Our emotions are tied with our memories.

A song can bring back a million memories in a few strums of a soulful guitar solo. A smell can make our mouth water and hunger for more than a favorite dish. A glimpse of a beautiful flower may make you ache because you'd love to give it to someone who would love and appreciate it...but who is no longer in your life.

We are made up of layers. Intricate, confusing, thick, necessary  layers. They hold in our memories, protect us from our pains, insulate us from our mistakes, and shed when we are ready to embrace change and growth.

We love and miss toxic people. We want to reach out, we want them back in our life, we miss their laugh, their smile, but know they are detrimental to our souls. Keeping them in our lives would only bring us pain so we do what we can by shutting them out, distancing ourselves from them and moving on. But we miss them still. Even though we made the tough decision to choose what's healthy for us our hearts and souls yearn for what once brought them comfort and joy. Because pain and pleasure often are not separate. Those who can bring us the most joy can also destroy us the quickest.

I do not necessarily know if we complicate life. We are born a blank slate, we are empty canvases that are colored by every experience we encounter. Sometimes though the colors are thrown quickly and splattered on our stretched screen of a canvas. They become muddied and run together and make it hard to figure out what exactly our masterpiece is supposed to be. I daresay it is safe to say, life complicates us.

Complicated just means we have lived, we are living, and that we are learning how to navigate our life and this confusing world.

Happiness does not elude those of us who have convoluted, tricky relationships. For those of us who simply cannot yet forgive for the wrongs done to us, for those of us who cannot simply flip a switch and be happy, for those of us who cannot just give up our job, our kids, our life to follow our dreams, for those of us who are still becoming who we are and sorting out what it means to be you-know you are complicated.

It just means our complicated selves may need to work a little harder for our own happiness. Mainly, we need to work on being happy and doing what we want and need to do whether life is a breeze or a confusing complicated conundrum. In doing that we must throw out any generalized cliched advice to simplify that people tell us to do, even if it is with their best intentions.  Our emotions and experiences are intertwined with our past, present and future and as much as we crave simple sometimes we are complicated.

And that's okay.

We are okay.

We're complicatokay.

This has been a Sunday Confession on the prompt complicated. Sunday Confessions are hosted by the one not impressed by morphine, sweet Auntie, cheese loving Hot Ash from More Than Cheese And Beer. Check out her awesomeness and the other talented bloggers who dared to take on this prompt.


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